What can I say? The post I wrote about Amsterdam I did not like. I would perhaps not have written it. But you can not go back nor can we erase what has been. That post is what it is and what it was. But not necessarily what will be.
Anyway ...
with conviction that I would think that it will not be forever my Amsterdam, you will not always be a sad blues. But he could be a lively swing. Amsterdam will be something new when I have the opportunity to go there. It will not be what was not.
will be what still needs to be enclosed in a possible future.
Someone spoke of "nostalgia for the future" as a feeling of nostalgia for the momentum that usually occurs in adolescence and slowly fades as we approach adulthood. It 's hard to think of it channeled bad at the time, so bad as to have caused deep cracks in their lives. So bad to have memories like this hard to Amsterdam. Nostalgia for the future is to think that will never change. But I have not yet figured out if the change exists.
Sometimes I think I want to be yet another person if it was me, what I was, I do not recognize. What we have now is the link between a recent past and what will be. But the future will or will in any case always an eternal present?
I like to think of the nostalgia for the future as a sweet swing or a hoarse blues that echoes through the old streets of New Orleans ... ah corrupt New Orleans, a city where I was going with the mind long ago. There is a post waiting for this. Tomorrow, perhaps ...
Yesterday was a day of sleep, and return to a warm core and deep.
I do not dive there used to be, to find rest and comfort. Now, it's like an apartment eviction, I expect to be thrown out at any moment. Insecurity. I always have one foot in and one foot out from all things. I'm always a bit 'out the door, I can never think of being able to enter and live in something deeply. Stop, sit down, relax. Nostalgia for the future, longing for a warm place that could be your home.
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